Letting go--

Like from a dream, i woke to a new life. A new physical, emotional and spiritual life. It's turning like waking up from the longest dream. It's hurting, deeply, to let go of the things that were so dear to me, to have thoughts at the middle of the night of the things that in that other place i could do, of the faces i could see whenever i wanted.
Tears would fall down and keep me from falling asleep. A big pressure in my chest with the need of letting emotions out will just keep me from resting. Letting go. Dying to myself, my desires. A hard thing to do, but He is prunning me, He is cutting from me the dry leaves, and even some that were not what He expected to be. He wants a perfect fruit, not only beautiful flowers. I cannot see what He is making, but i know i will understand, i just feel the pain and see blurry through the tears, it's not clear, but He is at work. I woke to a new life in Him, a life without self pleasing, but seeking what pleases Him. I want to know more of what He wants, of who He is, to love Him like when you are in love...you know? You want to be close to that person all the time, to see that person, to give everything, you don't think about yourself but about what he or she wants. You want that person to enjoy your company, to desire to be with you too, to embrace you, to support you. When that person is not around, you think about him/her, you want that person to be happy, fulfilled, you would give everything you could that is in your hands to give. You would give your life. You would die for him/her. That's the kind of love that He has for us, and because of His love we are able to love Him back. That's the new life i want, to be satisfied with my Lord.
Once, no long ago, i said to the Lord that i knew that He was doing something new in my life, that He and i know what will really hurt to me to loose, but that if that was the only way to become more like Him, then i wanted that, even if i knew inside of me that it was not possible that my flesh was the one asking for this, because i knew that would hurt; but the Spirit, helping me to interceed in the right way according to the Father's will. And at the same time, i was hoping that i would not have to loose that what i so much wanted.
Following the Lord is the most wonderful thing, that He would live in our hearts, our hearts that are not worthy of Him, but that He cleansed by the gift of His Son, in Him, in Jesus we are made clean so that He can come with the Father and dwell in us if we keep His words.
--Come dwell in me Lord, help me go through this valley, help me fix my eyes in You, thank you for revealing Yourself to me, i want more of you, and everytime, less of me Lord. Help me to rejoice even in the pain, knowing that it's all part of your work in my life, that it's all part of your love for me. Help me to let go.--

Natalia
http://tehilim23.blogspot.com/

Streams in the desert--

Blessed are those whose strength is in You...As they pass through the Valley of Baca, they make it a place of springs. (Psalm 84:5-6)

Comfort is not given to us when we are lighthearted and cheerful. We must travel the depths of emotion in order to experience comfort--one of God's most precious gifts. And then we must be prepared to become coworkers with Him.
When the sahdows of night--needed night-- gather over the garden of our souls, when leaves close up and flowers no longer reflect any sunlight within their folded petals, and when we experience even the thickest darkness, we must remember that we will never be found wanting and that the comforting drops of heavenly due fall only after the sun has set.

I've been through the valley of weeping,
The valley of sorrow and pain;
But the "God of all comfort"was with me,
At hand to uphold and sustain.

As the earth needs the clouds and sunshine,
Our souls need both sorrow and joy;
So He places us oft in the furnace,
The dross from the gold to destroy.

When he leads through some vally of trouble,
His omnipotent hand we trace;
For the trials and sorrows He sends us,
Are part of His lessons in grace.

Oft we run from the purging and pruning,
Forgetting the Gardener knows
That the deeper the cutting and trimming,
The richer the cluster that grows.

Well He knows that affliction is needed;
He has a wise purpose in view,
And in the dark valley He whispers,
"Soon you'll understand what I do."

As we travel through life's shadowed valley,
Fresh springs of His love ever rise;
And we learn that our sorrows and losses,
Are blessing just sent in disguise.

So we follow wherever He leads us,
Let the path be dreary or bright;
For we proved that our God can give comfort;
Our God can give song in the night.

L.B. Cowman